Dear Elli,
Today you are four years old. Happy Birthday! And Congratulations! To you and to me! We made it four whole years and we are both alive, relatively unscathed, and still reasonably well adjusted.
You have learned tons of stuff since your last birthday. Your biggest accomplishments include peeing on the potty, sleeping in a big girl bed, learning your letters and numbers, writing your name, and not getting kicked out of preschool for assaulting other students. I'm impressed on all fronts. Truly. Because I was pretty convinced that you were going to assault other students.
You also picked up a few nasty habits. They include Netflix, telling fellow motorists to "step on it, Grandma!" while we are driving, never allowing a cashier to scan an item of yours at the register without then considering the item tainted in some way and throwing it on the floor in a fit of rage, and an extreme aversion to bedtime.
But more awesome than any of your accomplishments and also sometimes more disturbing than any of your newfound bad habits, is the development of your fearless, willful, and wildly intense personality.
Everyone says that comes from me. But I'm not so sure. Because, quite frankly, you kind of scare the hell out of me. Your Daddy says I kind of scare the hell out of him. So maybe you did get it from me. Who knows.
You do what you want. Always. And it's not because I'm a pushover. Because I'm not. Not even close. I'm actually pretty hard on you. Because this mama's not raising no damn fool!
And you know the consequences of your actions. Hell, you even spend time calculating those consequences prior to engaging in foul behavior. I've watched you pause momentarily before hurling a book at the dog, deciding if it's worth it. And apparently it is.
And you take your punishment, fully knowing that it is coming and no matter what it is, with a complete lack of fear or regret. In fact, if you knew how to flip me the bird while engaging in foul behavior and waiting for your impending punishment, you would. I'd bet my last freaking dollar on it. It's really pretty impressive.
And that's why you kind of scare the hell out of me. Because I know we are going to have a very interesting and eventful next 14 years ahead of us until you go off to college and leave me to lick my maternal wounds in peace.
But in addition to scaring me, I'm very proud of you. Because you do what you want. Without fear or regret. And that same quality that makes me somewhat homicidal is also the one that will take you anywhere you want to go in life.
And even though you are only four, I already know this: You can do anything. Because nothing can stop you. You can be anything. Because nothing can stop you. And the intensity with which you drive yourself will result in the achievements you desire. And it will probably also result in you scaring the hell out of people.
So today, on your fourth birthday, I want you to know that I'm so proud to have you as my baby girl. And I'm so glad you give me a run for my money every single day. Because even though having a constantly calm, obedient, and agreeable child is probably nice sometimes, I wouldn't have anywhere near the respect, appreciation, or admiration that I have for you.
I'm so excited to watch you continue to grow. You are a remarkable child. And someday you will be a remarkable woman. I have no doubt.
Happy Birthday. And I love you.
Mom
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