Dear Elli,
Yesterday, I received my very first real Mother's Day gift from you. It was a bracelet made of colorful plastic beads and a pink jewelry box that you made at school.
Mother's Day was still three days away, but you couldn't wait to give me my gift. Your excitement was just as good as the gift. Maybe better.
So I wore my bracelet to work today because you asked me to. It was awesome. The few times I received a weird look I lifted my wrist and exclaimed with delight that my awesome bracelet was a gift from my baby girl. And if they had planned to poke fun at it...they became very quickly aware that I was totally prepared to take that particular fun poking session outside on my lunch hour. (I'm joking. I can't beat anyone up at work because I would be fired. And then we would all maybe starve to death.)
Anyway, this is the first year that I'm really excited about Mother's Day. Because you are excited. And that makes it special.
And on this Mother's Day, I want you to know that I love being your mom.
We are all quite aware that I poke fun at my follies of motherhood on a regular basis. This is my manic attempt at not having a nervous breakdown. Because if I didn't laugh every day you might find me curled up in a ball in the corner somewhere, rocking back and forth while drooling on myself. And that is totally uncool.
But even though I sometimes appear to be completely off my rocker, I still love being your mom. You bring me down to earth, and teach me what is truly important every day. Even on those days when I don't really feel like being taught.
Some of the reasons I love being your mom include the following:
1. Your belly laugh makes me happy, no matter how bad the day was.
2. When you tell me you love me, I don't care about anything else in the entire world for at least a full minute.
3. When you learn something new, I'm prouder of you than I've ever been of my own accomplishments.
4. When you refuse to listen regardless of the consequences and drive me to near insanity with your willfulness, I know that I am dealing with a small version of myself. And it makes me realize that my own Mom is a saint. Because she didn't murder me.
5. When I look into your beautiful blue eyes, I see my Dad looking back at me. And I know that I have successfully passed to you the most beautiful eyes in the world, from him, even though I don't share them myself.
6. When you tell me the things I do best consist of cooking dinner and cleaning the house, it actually makes me feel good. And you are the only one who could possibly receive a warm reception after saying that to me.
7. Your childhood has given me the opportunity to be a kid again, too. I get to swing, and play on a slip n slide, and dance around the house, and drink chocolate milk, and wake up on Christmas morning after Santa has made his rounds, and climb trees, and make weird faces in the mirror. It's totally freaking awesome!
8. I get to feel what it's like to be the center of your universe. Because I am your mom. And right now, while you are still little, I get to be the absolute definition of safety and comfort for you. Because you need me. And while that sometimes scares the living shit out of me because I still cannot fathom the fact that I have been entrusted with an actual human life, that is also profoundly amazing.
So, after all that, I think I'm going to have a great Mother's Day. Because through the good days and the bad, I love being your mom. And I have an awesome bracelet to rock for awhile. And a sweet pink jewelry box to put it in. And you will find both of them someday in a box of stuff somewhere in the basement after I'm dead. Because I'm not throwing them away. Ever.
I love you. And thank you for being so great. And making me love being your mom.
Mom
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