Supermodels

Dear Elli,

The topic of "body shaming" seems to be a hot one lately.  In fact, Victoria's Secret recently found itself in hot water over an advertising campaign that used the phrase "perfect body" in conjunction with a photo of some skinny young models frolicking around in their panties and bras.  This is called "body shaming" because if we agree that the models look awesome, we must somehow be shaming everyone else as a result. 

You see, people are concerned that the images of skinny models all over the place are causing young girls a multitude of problems, from low or no self-esteem and eating disorders to whatever else can go wrong inside the human mind.  The overall thought process is that companies should portray more "average" or "normal" looking people in advertising so that nobody's feelings are hurt and everyone can hold hands and hug one another.

I get it.  Normal people don't look like supermodels.  But isn't that why they're supermodels?  Because they are superior in the looks department?

And who's fault is it that young girls in America are screwed up?  I suppose we could blame the media, but isn't the media merely a reflection of us?  And if we tie our self-worth entirely to our physical attractiveness, and allow our children to do the same, whose fault is that?

So here it goes.  Here's what I think.  I think the models who work for Victoria's Secret are hot.  Their beauty is superior to mine, and to just about everyone else I've ever met.  Their physical attractiveness is elite.  And there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.  Victoria's Secret has no obligation, nor should they, to use models who look like me for their next underwear ad.  Not because I'm ugly.  Not because I should be ashamed of myself.  And not because my value as a human being is less.  The reason is really simple.  It's because they look better in underwear than I do.

We cannot all be superior at everything.  And we don't need to level the playing field so that everyone can feel special.  This goes well beyond supermodels and how much they may or may not eat for lunch.  That's irrelevant.

Let me frame this same argument in another light to clarify my logic:  I really want to be a brain surgeon.  And it hurts my feelings and makes me feel like shit because I'm not as smart as the elite brain surgeons of the world.  So I think those brain surgeons should all step aside and let me operate on people's brains so that I can feel special.  Because the current required intellect of an elite brain surgeon is not realistic for the rest of us.

That's freaking ridiculous, right?  So why should average-looking people be the new supermodels?

Believe it or not, this letter was a hard one.  To frame it the way I thought I should.  I know it's difficult sometimes to feel good about yourself.  We all want to look great.  We all want to be great.  I am as guilty as anyone.  But at the end of the day, we can't be the best in every way.

That, however, is no excuse to criminalize the appreciation of those who have some specific superior quality.  Whether someone is a genius, a supermodel, or Beyonce, if we're going to stop screwing ourselves up we should probably just try to appreciate the people who do some things better than us. 

So there's my lesson for today. 

I love you.

Mom