Dear Elli,
Today was your very last day of kindergarten. And guess what!?! You passed!
I'm not actually surprised that you passed. You're pretty smart. I'm really more surprised that it's over. I feel like I just sent you off on that big yellow school bus all by yourself for the first time. And now you've got an entire school year under your belt.
Now that you've been exposed to the outside world, you've learned a ton!
You learned a whole new vocabulary. You now say things like "BFF" and "Boom Shakalaka!".
You learned to read. And that is the single coolest thing ever.
You drew a picture of a girl and boy before dinner tonight, and the picture was captioned with the following song lyric:
"My x man with his noow grlfren" (My ex-man with his new girlfriend)
I'm not shitting you. Thank you, Taylor Swift, for educating my 5-year-old in the art of "shaking it off". I suppose I should be grateful.
You learned that sticking your middle finger up is awful. And awfully hilarious, as far as you're concerned. The 4th graders on the bus taught you that.
You learned that some kids don't have a mommy and daddy at home. Some just have a mommy. And some just a daddy.
You learned how to count to 100 by 1's, 5's, and 10's. And you learned that $1 is the same as 100 pennies. And that the tooth fairy gives $1 per tooth, because she's not freaking made of money and she rarely carries cash.
You learned that sometimes kids are really mean, and sometimes they're really nice. Sometimes they make you cry, and sometimes they make you feel so happy your heart feels like it's going to burst.
You learned about dinosaurs, and the difference between meat eaters and plant eaters. You learned about fossils, too.
You learned that it's your responsibility to work out problems and make good choices. You learned that I won't do that for you, even though I really want to sometimes.
You learned that nobody likes a tattle tale. Especially me. And I couldn't possibly care less about what Susie did on the playground, unless she's waiving a pistol around or bleeding profusely.
You learned that you hate basketball, but that soccer is pretty cool.
You learned all about the state of Ohio. I had no idea that our state insect is the ladybug or that our flower is the carnation. So I learned that, too.
You learned that some kids live in big houses, and some live in little apartments. And both are pretty cool.
You're starting to understand the world.
You're growing up. That's the whole goal of being a parent, you know. To raise you and help you grow. And you're doing a fantastic job of it. You're making me look good, kiddo. Keep it up.
I love you, and I'm proud of your hard work this year. Even though you recite trashy Taylor Swift lyrics on your drawings.
Mom
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